Thank You, Daddy...

So technically this is not the beginning of the "new year" but it is a "new month" for me and this is how my first day of the month went:

REWIND: so i had just bought a "brand spanking used" car from a dealership in Huntington Beach just about 4 days ago. This was a huge right of passage for me because it was the first car that i had really bought on my own. moving to california has made me take things into my own hands and made me gain a HUGE sense of independency--everything from getting a new bank, a new car, and new responsibility for my finances.

ever since the beginning of januaray i had made a list of things i wanted to do this year: (QUOTING THIS FROM MY MYSPACE BLOG)


» get back down to my ideal body (i know i know, its everyone's goal but i SERIOUSLY feel unhealthy) I wanna look like this again:**IVE BEEN ON A GOOD GYM STREAK- AT LEAST 5-6 DAYS A WEEK & ON A HEALTHY DIET!! IM WELL ON MY WAY
» drink no more than once a week...hopefully **SO FAR IVE BEEN A GOOD GIRL» be 20 minutes earlier for everything...im ALWAYS fkn late & that needs to change! **I HAVENT BEEN LATE FOR WORK YET EXCEPT FOR ONE TIME THERE WAS A HUGE ACCIDENT ON THE FREEWAY-TOTALLY WASNT MY FAULT
» pay all my bills on time & pay off both credit cards **WHEN $$ PERMITS
» read at least one book a month **NOT QUITE YET
» learn to cook more things & eat at home more often **EATING HEALTHIER HAS FORCED ME TO COOK AND EAT AT HOME MORE OFTEN & TAKE HOME LUNCH =)
» go back to Hawaii to see my family & friends **TENTATIVELY JULY 6-15...BE READY FOR ME!!!
» join a volleyball league in the spring or summer time (anyone know of any good leagues in SoCal?) **BUSY SCHEDULE MAY NOT LET ME TO
» buy a new (used) car...this car of mine has been through WAY too much for my liking ** JUST BOUGHT A CAR TODAY AND SOLD MY PEICE OF SHIT!!!! YAY!!!
» Save money for school (at least a couple hundred a month for school) **WORKING ON THAT
» set aside some money for Australia in December 2009 new years!!! **PROBABLY WONT HAPPEN COZ I BOUGHT MY CAR
» get on a regular sleep schedule - no more insomnia!! **SLEEP SCHEDULE IS STILL A LITTLE OFF
» volunteer with some organization or at a pet shelter **IF I HAVE TIME
& last but not least...
♥ fall in love =) ♥

so...ever since i have made these goals (note: ive just updated this like 4 days ago), ive been really good about keeping to my promises and goals..up until tonight...

so its super bowl day--pretty much an excuse for people to go out and get drunk, reason for cops to go out and arrest people--blah blah blah...i didnt even know who was playing today in the super bowl until this morning (steelers vs cardinals). no big deal. it was my day off and my indulge/relax day because it was my once a week that i can go out and relax with some friends or family...i had waken up at about noon-my cousin wanted to go out to breakfast with me but i regretfully declined because i had to go get some work clothes for my new job starting tomorrow. so when i got back from shopping i asked him if he still wanted to go out to watch the super bowl game and he didnt wanna go because he wasnt feeling good the last two days. i had gotten a text message from rachel from work asking me if i wanted to go to cabo cantina in newport beach to watch the super bowl game. i wasnt doing anything so i ended up going....leaving all innocence and mind at home...i went to meet up with some co-workers not thinking anything and had made the worst decision ever...drinking and driving. i shouldve known better, costa mesa is the WORST place to be driving when youve had a couple drinks...and seriously thats all ive had--i had 5 drinks within the nearly 5 hours i had been out...technically 5 drinks in 5 hours. the cop had pulled me over with an undisclosed reason other than "i followed you from the bar" and i had automatically thought he assumed i was drinking because i was at a bar. i kinda lied to him because i was nervous and i honestly wanted to get out of it. i did the sobriety test and i guess he wanted to test be with the breathalyzer and i guess i had gone over by about .03%...i was automatically arrested and taken to the police station...THE most scariest and uncertain thing that has ever happened to me. it just didnt feel real and i was scared and felt so alone. i never wanna be put in that situation again. my cousin ended up picking me up after about an hour--which felt like days. i never ever wanna be in jail again- especially with crazy white people locked up. thank god i did not have to post bail. so this was my lesson. this was IT. NEVER AGAIN will i ever make that stupid mistake of driving under the influence. now i will be paying for the rest of my life. not necessarily financially but mentally. Im incredibly embarrased and never wanna put myself or anyone else in that situation. Why me? Why tonight? My daddy was watching me and thought i seriously needed a wake up call. My new years goals just didnt cut it. I needed a sign, something BIG to set me straight. Thanks daddy. This is MY BEGINNING